Fic: Dreaming With Open Eyes (2/2)

[rusty_armour]

Title: Dreaming With Open Eyes
Author: Rusty Armour
Pairing: Sheppard/Lorne
Summary: Often what is buried in the unconscious doesn’t stay that way.
Word Count: 4,798
Rating: NC-17
Spoilers: Before I Sleep, Sunday, Doppelganger, Season Five in general
Disclaimer: Thou Shalt Not Steal. Even in the interest of fic. Most of these characters aren't mine. I, uh, borrowed them. Yeah.

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Sheppard had no memory of falling asleep, but he knew he must have done so when he opened his eyes to find Lorne sitting up in his bed, staring at him. Sheppard wondered if he could trick Lorne into believing it was all a dream if he kept quiet long enough, but Lorne seemed to be fully awake despite his mussed up hair and rumpled t-shirt.

“Good morning, sir,” Lorne said.

Sheppard tried to come up with something intelligent to say. “Uh…hi.” He winced inwardly. “You’re probably wondering what I’m doing here.”

Lorne rubbed his eyes. “I have to admit that I’m kind of curious, yeah.”

Sheppard nodded. “I can see why you would be.”

Lorne propped his chin on his hand and looked directly at Sheppard. “I was sleepwalking, wasn’t I?”

“Yes,” Sheppard said. “Yes, you were.”

Lorne sighed wearily. “I’m sorry. It’s the first time this has happened since…Well, since the crystal entity.” He ran a hand across his face. “It won’t happen again, sir.”

Now it was Sheppard who sighed. “I don’t think it’s going to be that simple.” When Lorne stared at him questioningly, Sheppard said, “Last night wasn’t the first time. Rodney has caught you sleepwalking on at least a few occasions.”

Lorne blushed. “Oh. I…I didn’t know.”

Sheppard smiled sympathetically. “Well, it might have helped if someone had told you. I’m telling you now because I think you have a right to know and knowledge is power, right?”

Lorne frowned uncertainly. “I guess so.”

Sheppard leaned forward in the armchair. “Look, I’m not saying this is a problem we can solve overnight, but now that we’re aware of it we can be on the lookout in case it happens again.”

“Uh, sir, I can’t exactly control when I sleepwalk as I’m asleep at the time,” Lorne said.

“No, but we know that stress is a major trigger.” Sheppard rose from the armchair and sat on the foot of Lorne’s bed. “If you find a way to relieve that stress before you go to sleep then maybe it will stop you from sleepwalking.”

Lorne raised an eyebrow. “And how do you suggest I do that, sir?”

Sheppard froze for a second, looking a little like the proverbial deer in headlights. “Oh…well…You could talk to someone. You could, uh, talk to me.”

Lorne’s eyes widened. “Uh, no offence, sir, but you’re not exactly good at handling…emotional stuff.”

Sheppard crossed his arms. “Then I guess it’s just something I’ll have to work on.”

Lorne nodded warily. “Yes, sir.”

“Good,” Sheppard said. “This is good. You see, I’m getting better at this already.” He stood up and began backing towards the door. “I’m glad we had this talk, Major.”

“Uh, yeah,” Lorne said.

Sheppard was unable to hide his relief when he reached the door. “I should go now. I have to…do things.”

Lorne smothered a laugh. “Thanks for stopping by, Colonel.”

“No problem,” Sheppard said as he bolted from Lorne’s quarters.


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It had been a long day. To say that the negotiations had gone smoothly would be an exaggeration, but Woolsey had managed to forge a treaty with the Hoovians in the end. It had taken hours, and Sheppard had been amazed by Woolsey’s patience, perseverance, and sheer stubbornness. Sheppard had only needed to address the Elders a few times, but he’d still found the whole process exhausting. When he returned to Atlantis, his only thought was to grab a quick meal and then crash for the night. However, he’d only been asleep for a couple of hours when he heard his door chime. Sitting up with a groan, Sheppard stumbled towards his door, fully prepared to chew out whoever had disturbed his slumber.

“This had better be important,” Sheppard growled as his door swished open. Then he felt his anger fade away when he saw who was standing outside his quarters.

“I don’t sleepwalk,” Lorne said, his words belied by his blank stare and the slow monotone of his voice.

Sheppard’s brow furrowed. “You came here to tell me you don’t sleepwalk while sleepwalking?” When Lorne didn’t answer, Sheppard sighed. “Uh…just wait here a second.” Sheppard rushed back inside his room and grabbed his radio off the bedside table. “Rodney, I need you to come to my quarters.”

There was a slight pause before McKay responded, sounding a little breathless. “Can it wait? I’m kind of in the middle of something.”

“No, it can’t wait,” Sheppard said. “Get your ass here now.”

McKay arrived at Sheppard’s quarters three minutes later. Sheppard rolled his eyes when he saw that McKay’s hair was a mess and his t-shirt was inside out. McKay glanced from Sheppard to Lorne in confusion. “What is it?”

“He’s sleepwalking again,” Sheppard said.

McKay’s eyes flitted back to Lorne. “And?”

“And what?” Sheppard snapped. “You’re the expert. I want you to fix it.”

“Let me get this straight,” McKay said. “You got me out of bed with my girlfriend because your second-in-command is sleepwalking?” His eyes narrowed. “You told him, didn’t you? You told him after I expressly told you not to.”

Sheppard scowled. “Yes, I told him. Happy now?”

“I was happy about four or five minutes ago,” McKay said. “Now? Not so much.” Seeing the helpless look on Sheppard’s face, he threw up his hands. “I don’t know what you expect me to do. You’re the one who stressed him out by telling him he had started sleepwalking again.”

Sheppard frowned, looking genuinely puzzled. “But I told him it was okay, that he could talk to me if he had any problems.”

McKay snickered. “Yeah, right.”

“No,” Sheppard said. “Seriously.”

McKay blinked. “Oh. Wow. Well, maybe when given the choice between sleepwalking and having a stilted and painful heart-to-heart with you, Lorne chose sleepwalking.”

Sheppard glared at McKay. “You know, I could really do with a little less criticism and a lot more help, Rodney.”

“You want my help?” McKay asked. “Well, okay, then.” He reached out to take Lorne’s arm, but Sheppard slapped his hand away.

“No, I don’t want you to walk him back to his quarters: I want you to cure him of this thing,” Sheppard said.

McKay’s eyebrows rose dramatically. “You want me to cure Lorne of sleepwalking?”

Sheppard nodded vigorously. “Yes.”

“Well, I’m sorry, John,” McKay said, “but short of taking him to a sleep clinic I really don’t see what we can do, unless…” He shook his head. “No, you wouldn’t want to do that.”

“Do what?” Sheppard asked.

McKay shook his head again. “No, it’s a stupid idea. Forget I said anything.”

Sheppard grabbed McKay by the shoulders. “Tell me,” he said.

McKay swallowed and shot a nervous look at Lorne. “Well, I was thinking that if you stayed with him, he might be less likely to sleepwalk.”

Sheppard rubbed a hand across his face. “I did that last night and it didn’t work.”

“Yes, but that would have been after Lorne was sleepwalking, and he wouldn’t have known you were there,” McKay said. “What you need to do is be there when he goes to sleep.”

Sheppard grimaced. “Are you suggesting I tuck him in and read him a bedtime story as well?”

“This is why I didn’t want to tell you,” McKay said. “I knew you’d just make fun of the idea.” He turned to walk away, but Sheppard quickly dodged in front of him, blocking his path.

“Okay, okay, I’m sorry I made fun of your idea,” Sheppard said. “I promise I’ll keep my mouth shut. Just…just tell me what you think I should do.”

McKay studied Sheppard for a moment before relenting. “Lorne needs to feel safe and secure, so you weren’t too far off the mark when you suggested tucking him in and reading him a bedtime story.”

Sheppard’s jaw dropped. “You’re kidding, right?”

“You could stay with me,” Lorne said. “I’d like that.” He began heading towards his quarters, trailing one hand along the wall as he walked.

Sheppard’s eyes widened. “He didn’t just say that. Tell me he didn’t just say that.”

“He just said that,” McKay said. “You’d better go after him and make sure he gets back to his quarters okay.” He gave Sheppard a helpful shove, backing away quickly when Sheppard wheeled around.

“Why can’t you go?” Sheppard demanded.

McKay waved a hand in the direction of Keller’s quarters. “Jenn might still be awake, which means I could still get lucky.”

“Do you think you could possibly stop thinking about your sex life for more than two minutes?” Sheppard asked.

“I’m a guy, so what do you think?” McKay said. Then he grinned, waved, and rushed back to Keller’s quarters. Heaving a huge sigh, Sheppard took off after Lorne.

Sheppard managed to catch up to Lorne before he reached his quarters. As Lorne didn’t turn to look at him, Sheppard wasn’t sure if Lorne even knew he was there. However, Lorne didn’t protest when Sheppard followed him inside his quarters, so Sheppard assumed he’d been given permission.

To Sheppard’s surprise, he found himself pulling Lorne’s sheets over him after Lorne climbed into bed. Then Sheppard shook his head in resignation and crawled in after him. “Don’t take this the wrong way,” Sheppard said, “but I’m too exhausted to sleep in that chair again.” Lorne had curled up on his side and seemed completely oblivious to Sheppard’s presence. Sheppard turned so that he was facing Lorne’s back. “I hope this won’t be too big a shock for you in the morning.”


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Sheppard woke to the smell of coffee. He stared blearily at the table beside him, wondering if he was hallucinating when he saw the steaming mug on its surface. He slowly sat up and found himself face to face with Lorne, who was sitting in the armchair with a mug of his own, watching Sheppard in amusement.

“Okay, I was expecting you to deck me, not bring me coffee,” Sheppard said.

Lorne shrugged. “It was a toss-up. I went for coffee in the end because I was craving caffeine more than a bruised fist.”

Sheppard studied Lorne for a few seconds, but was too groggy to figure out whether Lorne was joking or not. He picked up the mug beside him and took a long sip.

“I assume I was sleepwalking again,” Lorne said.

Sheppard placed his mug back on the table. “Yeah.”

Lorne grimaced. “I’m sorry, Colonel,” he said. “I didn’t expect it to happen two nights in a row. You should have just left me outside my quarters. I probably would have put myself back to bed.”

“Yeah, well…” Sheppard yawned, stretched, and reached for his cup of coffee again. “I was talking to Rodney last night and he seemed to think that you might sleep better if there was someone in the room with you.”

Lorne’s forehead furrowed. “To make sure I don’t sleepwalk? Sir, that’s really not–”

Sheppard raised a hand. “Just hear me out, okay? I was thinking that you might be less likely to sleepwalk if you knew someone else was there. You might feel less stressed out and, uh, safer.”

Lorne tensed in the armchair. “I’m a bit old for a teddy bear, sir.”

Sheppard shook his head. “No, it wouldn’t be like that. Think of it as…as a buddy system.” Sheppard tried to smile reassuringly. “Look, we can try it for a few nights and if it doesn’t work we’ll try something else.”

Lorne frowned. “I can’t ask you to do that, sir.”

“Who’s asking?” Sheppard said. “I’m volunteering.” He pulled back the sheets from the bed and stood up. “How about I drop by your quarters with my sleeping-bag around 2300?”

Lorne sighed reluctantly. “You don’t need to bring a sleeping-bag, sir. If you’re going to stay here tonight, you can take the bed and I’ll take the floor.”


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Sheppard rolled on to his back and stared up at the ceiling. Lorne had been asleep for almost two hours and, based on what McKay had told him, was probably past the point of somnambulism as sleepwalking was supposed to occur before the REM cycle began. However, Sheppard found that his eyes kept popping open and straying to the man in the sleeping-bag. He was beginning to wonder if he should have listened to McKay and minded his own business. From what he could tell, Lorne’s sleepwalking really wasn’t that big a deal. In fact, the only person who seemed to be suffering was Lorne himself, who had been booted out of his own bed and forced to sleep on the floor.

Sheppard yawned. In the morning, he’d tell Lorne that it was a stupid idea to monitor him and apologize for all the grief he’d caused. Maybe if he got off the guy’s back, Lorne would be able to make it through a full night without sleepwalking.

Sheppard had rolled over on his side and was drifting towards sleep, when he heard a rustle from the floor. His eyes flew open and he caught sight of Lorne emerging from his sleeping-bag and rising to his feet. Thinking the lights on, Sheppard threw back his sheets and sprang off the bed. He seized Lorne from behind, wrapping his arms tightly around Lorne’s waist.

“It’s okay,” Sheppard whispered in Lorne’s ear. “You don’t have to go anywhere. You’re safe here. I’ll look after you, Evan.”

When Lorne didn’t struggle, Sheppard started to release his hold on him, only to have Lorne turn in his arms and kiss him. Sheppard froze for an instant and then found himself responding. His hands grasped Lorne’s hips and he pulled Lorne closer. Then Lorne’s tongue was pressing against Sheppard’s lips, and Sheppard opened his mouth, his own tongue twining with Lorne’s. It was only when Sheppard began reaching for the hem of Lorne’s t-shirt that morality kicked in. He broke the kiss and stepped away from Lorne, breathless and trembling.

“This-this isn’t right,” Sheppard said. “I’m taking advantage of you. You…You don’t know what you’re doing.” He hesitated a moment before reaching out to take Lorne’s hand. He led Lorne to his bed, tucking him in once Lorne had stretched out on the mattress. Then he sat down in the armchair, his eyes fixed on Lorne, his mind reeling as he thought about the kiss.


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“Where did you disappear to last night? When I woke up this morning, you were gone.”

Sheppard glanced up at Lorne from his laptop, trying not to blush. He had left when he had woken up with an erection after a particularly erotic dream involving his second-in-command. But he wasn’t about to tell Lorne that. “I, uh, left when I realized that it was almost morning and you were sleeping okay.”

Lorne gave Sheppard an inquisitive look. “But I was sleepwalking again, wasn’t I? When I woke up, I wasn’t in the sleeping-bag anymore.” He sat down on the corner of Sheppard’s desk. “You’re coming back tonight, right?”

Sheppard started in surprise and his voice was an octave higher in pitch than he would have liked. “You want me to come back?” He cleared his throat and tried again. “I don’t know if that’s a good idea, Major. I mean, my being there obviously isn’t helping if you’re still sleepwalking.”

Lorne raised an eyebrow. “I wouldn’t have taken you for a quitter, sir.”

“What?” Sheppard said.

A smile tugged at Lorne’s lips. “It’s only been one night, Colonel. You said it yourself: this isn’t something that can be instantly fixed.”

“I did say that, didn’t I?” Sheppard’s eyes flicked to the blank screen on his monitor. “Maybe you’d be better off finding someone else to help you – someone with more experience with…this kind of thing. Rodney would be a good choice. His sister used to sleepwalk.”

Lorne grimaced. “If McKay tried to help me, I’d sleepwalk for sure – just to get away from him!” He sighed and stared down at his hands. “Sir, if you don’t want to help me anymore just say so. It won’t hurt my feelings.”

“No, it’s not that,” Sheppard said.

“Then what’s the problem?” Lorne asked.

Sheppard tried to think of a suitable excuse and failed, so, in the end, he went with the truth. “There’s no problem.”

“Great. I’ll see you tonight.” Lorne hopped to the floor and left Sheppard’s office. Sheppard stared after him then began banging his head on the desk.


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“Sir, I was thinking that maybe this would work better if we both slept in the same bed,” Lorne said.

Sheppard almost dropped Lorne’s sleeping-bag. He had announced on his arrival that he would be taking the floor for the night. He had hoped that by positioning the sleeping-bag directly in front of the door, he would be instantly alerted if Lorne started sleepwalking. If Lorne didn’t trip or walk on top of him, Sheppard assumed he’d be woken up when Lorne tried to step over the sleeping-bag. The plan was practically flawless, and Lorne was trying to sabotage it.

Managing to keep his voice steady, Sheppard asked, “What difference does it make whether we both sleep in the bed or not?”

“Well, we’d both be more comfortable for one thing,” Lorne said. He reached out and snatched the sleeping-bag from Sheppard’s hands. “We’re both adults, right? And it isn’t as if we haven’t had to sleep in some pretty tight spaces before. I mean, what harm could it do?” Sheppard swallowed uncomfortably. Oh, if only Lorne knew. “Look, if it’s all the same to you, I’ll take the sleeping-bag. I, uh, like camping.”

Lorne snorted. “Do you seriously expect me to believe you’d choose a sleeping-bag on the floor over a bed?” He tilted his head to one side thoughtfully. “Unless it’s the company you’re objecting to. Do you have a problem sharing a bed with me, sir?”

“No, of course not,” Sheppard snapped. “I just thought you’d be more comfortable if you didn’t have to share that tiny mattress, that’s all.”

“Oh, I think I’ll manage,” Lorne said, and Sheppard was sure he had to be imagining the twinkle in Lorne’s eyes.

Sheppard was positive that he wouldn’t be able to sleep a wink that night. Once he was under the covers, he lay stiffly beside Lorne, unable to shut down his brain and ease into slumber. That was why he was surprised when he jolted awake just after 0130. Surprise turned to shock when he realized that there was a hand caressing his chest.

“No!” Sheppard shouted, thinking on the lights. Then he grabbed Lorne and shook him. “I know I’m not supposed to do this, but I need you to wake up. Evan, wake up!” Sheppard stared into Lorne’s eyes, desperately searching for any sign of consciousness. What he saw stunned him into silence for almost a full minute. He slowly lowered his hands and said, “You aren’t sleepwalking, are you?”

Lorne took a deep breath, as if gathering his courage. “No, I’m not.”

Sheppard gaped at Lorne in confusion. “Last night you kissed me. Were you awake then too?”

“Yes, sir,” Lorne whispered.

“I don’t believe this,” Sheppard said. “I really don’t believe this.” He jumped off the bed and walked across the room. “Were you ever sleepwalking or was this all some elaborate joke?”

Lorne couldn’t meet Sheppard’s eyes. “That first time in the infirmary was real. I really was sleepwalking then.”

“And then what?” Sheppard demanded. “You thought it would be fun to continue sleepwalking, so you faked it?”

Lorne bit his lip. “It started off as a prank. McKay and I thought it would be funny if I showed up at your quarters and announced that I was sleepwalking while pretending to sleepwalk.”

Sheppard whirled around angrily. “Rodney was in on it?”

Lorne flinched. “We never thought you’d fall for it. We were sure you’d figure it out right away. McKay was genuinely surprised when you called and asked him to come to your quarters.”

Sheppard scowled. “Well, he obviously wasn’t too surprised to play along with your Lady Macbeth act.”

“I know,” Lorne said. “Usually, he’s a terrible liar.” When Sheppard glared at him, Lorne added, “We should have confessed everything to you right away.”

“Then why didn’t you?” Sheppard asked.

Lorne risked taking a peek at Sheppard before lowering his eyes again. “You were so concerned and…and determined to help me. I didn’t have the heart to tell you.”

Sheppard stood at the foot of the bed, his hands on his hips. “And what about the next morning after, or when you pretended to sleepwalk the night after that?”

Lorne winced. “I was embarrassed and chickened out. I tried to talk you out of helping me the next morning, but you just wouldn’t take no for an answer.”

“Then why did you sleepwalk again?” Sheppard cried.

“I, uh, didn’t,” Lorne said. “I was just getting up to go to the bathroom. I didn’t even realize you were awake and I certainly wasn’t expecting you to grab me.”

Sheppard moved closer to the bed. “But you kissed me. Why? Was it a joke? Were you just messing around?”

Lorne shut his eyes. “No, it was real.”

“Then why did you pretend you were asleep?” Sheppard was standing right beside Lorne now, studying him as if he were seeing him for the first time.

“It seemed like the perfect opportunity to see if you might be interested, to, uh, test the waters.” Lorne opened his eyes and dared to look up at Sheppard. “I figured that if you weren’t interested, I could pretend I didn’t remember anything, and you could chalk it all up to the sleepwalking.”

“And if I were interested?” Sheppard asked.

“Well, I was hoping to discover that last night, but you were too much of a gentleman to let things go beyond kissing,” Lorne said.

Sheppard smiled ruefully. “Well, maybe if I’d known you weren’t really sleepwalking, it might have helped. Why didn’t you just say something?”

Lorne stared at Sheppard in disbelief. “Oh, I don’t know. Maybe ‘Don’t ask, don’t tell,’ or the fact that you’re my C.O., or the fear of being transferred or kicked out of the military.”

Sheppard sat down on the edge of the mattress. “That’s bull. You know I couldn’t care less about DADT, and you’d have to do something a lot worse than hit on me before I decided to have you transferred. What’s the real reason, Evan?”

Lorne gazed down at the mattress and muttered something under his breath.

“I’m sorry,” Sheppard said. “What was that?”

Lorne groaned. “I thought you might reject me, all right?”

Sheppard placed his hand over Lorne’s. “And why would you think that?”

Lorne’s eyes widened. “Because…because you’re Lieutenant Colonel John Sheppard and you could pretty much have anyone you want in the galaxy.”

Sheppard shook his head. “I doubt that,” he said. “Besides, I’m happy with what’s in front of me right now, thank you very much.” He smiled and leaned forward, brushing his lips gently against Lorne’s. “Why don’t we do something radical and try this when we’re both awake?”

Lorne nodded slowly. “That sounds like a plan, sir.”

“John,” Sheppard said.

“John.” Lorne raised his fingers to Sheppard’s cheek, as if to check whether he was really awake and not dreaming. Sheppard curled his own fingers around the back of Lorne’s neck and captured Lorne’s lips with his own.

They were bolder this time. Lorne’s tongue didn’t caress Sheppard’s lips in a silent request for admittance, but charged inside Sheppard’s mouth. Sheppard moaned and sucked on Lorne’s tongue, deepening the kiss. Sheppard’s hands fumbled for the hem of Lorne’s t-shirt and he tugged it halfway up Lorne’s chest, while Lorne’s hands had simply dived under Sheppard’s t-shirt, grazing the muscles in Sheppard’s back. Both men were panting by the time they ended the kiss. Then Sheppard was yanking Lorne’s t-shirt over his head and pushing him down on the bed.

Lorne gasped when Sheppard first bit and then licked his neck. When Sheppard’s lips began to explore Lorne’s collar-bone, Lorne clutched at Sheppard’s back helplessly. He pulled on Sheppard’s t-shirt, and Sheppard stopped nuzzling his collar-bone long enough for Lorne to remove the garment. Lorne instantly ran his fingers through the thick dark hair on Sheppard’s chest. He swept a thumb over one nipple and Sheppard jerked. Lorne grinned and tried to sit up, so that he might have better access to Sheppard’s chest, but Sheppard shoved him back down on the mattress and took one of Lorne’s nipples in his mouth. Lorne’s back arched and he just managed to hold back a whimper. He tried to reach the waistband of Sheppard’s track pants, but it was out of reach. Then, as if reading his mind, Sheppard released the nipple and first drew down Lorne’s track pants and then his own.

Lorne just had time to catch sight of Sheppard’s flushed penis, before Sheppard grasped both of their cocks in his fist and started jacking them off. Lorne’s hips bucked and he grabbed Sheppard’s ass. Sheppard tightened his grip on their cocks and began thrusting his pelvis. Lorne writhed beneath him and, this time, he couldn’t stop himself from whimpering.

Neither of them lasted long. When Lorne came, he threw his head back and shouted his release. Sheppard froze and then shuddered, before falling across Lorne. Lorne stroked Sheppard’s back as they both recovered from the aftershocks of their orgasms.

“Well,” Lorne said, “that beats sleepwalking any day.”


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Lorne wasn’t entirely surprised to find Sheppard hanging out in McKay’s lab. He was even less surprised to see them engaged in a rather intense match of computer golf. Lorne resisted the urge to raise his eyes to the ceiling in supplication, schooling his face into an expressionless mask instead. As he approached Sheppard, he tried to make his movements seem slow and lethargic. Sheppard was so wrapped up in the game that Lorne almost had to walk in front of the large computer screen before Sheppard noticed him.

“Ah,” Sheppard said. “I think we’re going to have to call it a night, Rodney.” He grasped Lorne’s arm and began to steer him out of the lab. “I’m really sorry about this, but duty calls.”

They had almost reached the door, when Rodney’s voice halted them in their tracks. “If you didn’t want to hang out with me, you could have just said so. You didn’t have to get Lorne to do his sleepwalking routine.”

Sheppard turned around quickly. “It’s not what you think, Rodney.”

McKay raised his chin. “Oh, really? Because from where I’m standing, that’s exactly what it looks like.”

Sheppard shifted guiltily, at a loss for an explanation, and Lorne realized that it would be up to him. He wracked his brain for the right words to say. Then, when he failed, he just spit it out. “John and I are…Well, we’re sort of seeing each other.”

McKay stared at them for several seconds before his lopsided frown transformed into a grin. “I knew it!” he said.

Sheppard snorted. “Yeah, sure you did, Rodney.”

McKay glared at Sheppard. “Well, I was…I was pretty close to guessing!” He started going through the pockets of his uniform and then gave a triumphant cry when he found what he was looking for. “Here! Take these!” he said, shoving five condoms into Sheppard’s hands.

Lorne had to bite his lip to keep from laughing when he saw the horrified expression on Sheppard’s face.

“Don’t…” Sheppard croaked. “Don’t ever do that again.”

McKay was practically beaming now. “It’s okay. I’m dating a doctor, so I’ve got an endless supply of prophylactics.”

Lorne bit his lip even harder and nodded. “Thanks, McKay. We’ll treasure these.”

McKay waved aside Lorne’s gratitude with a broad sweep of his hand. “There’s no need to thank me. Just go forth and have sex.”

Lorne saluted and dragged his shaken lover from the lab.

“That can never happen again,” Sheppard said.

Lorne patted his back reassuringly. “It’s okay. Next time we’ll go directly to Keller, or I’ll just do what I usually do and steal them off the Marines.”

Sheppard had recovered his composure by the time they reached Lorne’s quarters, going so far as to grab a kiss in the corridor. “You know, your sleepwalking might not be such a bad thing after all,” he said. “It could come in handy next time I’m stuck in a really boring meeting. You could show up, and I’d have to leave to escort you back to your quarters.” He waggled his eyebrows. “We could have sex virtually any time we wanted.”

Lorne clasped Sheppard’s hand in his. “At the moment, I’ll settle for right here and now.”

Sheppard looked down at their hands and smiled. “Yeah, me too.”


Part One