Fic: A Matter of Pride
Apr. 25th, 2012 11:08 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
rusty_armourTitle: A Matter of Pride
Author: Rusty Armour
Fandom: Pride
Characters: Linus, Fleck, Dark
Category: General – and dramedy that veers sharply into parody.
Rating: PG-13
Warning: Contains lions, nauseatingly cute cubs,
Word Count: 3,881
Summary: Linus and Fleck are both searching for something; they just don’t know it yet.
Notes: I originally had this idea last year after first seeing Pride. At the time, I managed to quash it. In fact, I thought I’d forgotten the idea altogether. Then I saw The Truth About Lions on TVO and, unfortunately, it came back with a vengeance. I tried once again to suppress it, but it wouldn’t leave me alone. Apologies for writing this. Apologies for ever being born.
I’m still debating whether I should even post this – not because of the subject matter (though there is that) but because the tone isn’t entirely consistent throughout the story. I think it shifts a little too quickly from dramedy to parody, but, at this point, my perspective is completely shot. Anywaaaaaaay, take it or send it death threats. I’ll leave the choice up to you. For those of you on the fence, this fic wasn’t beta’d or Britpicked, so maybe that will help you make your decision. *g*
Disclaimer: I don’t own any of these characters because they’re wild animals and they need to be free. Okay, I tried to sneak off with a couple of cubs, but the lionesses didn’t like that at all.
Linus’s attention was drawn to the river by the honking cry of a Grey Crowned Crane and the rapid flutter of wings. He jerked awake and was instantly on his feet. From the top of the outcrop, he could see a large herd of buffalo. Was this what had startled the crane? No, there was something else. Linus could feel it. Then he saw it. A flash of gold along the riverbank. He moved closer to the edge of the outcrop and was able to make out more shapes in the grass. A whole hunting party.
It wasn’t his family. This was outside their pride area. In fact, he hadn’t thought there were any prides nearby, which is why he’d chosen this region for his range. Must be a pride on the move, Linus thought, and he had a sinking feeling that he knew exactly which pride: the Wanderers. Deciding it was better to keep a low profile, Linus crouched down on the rock, watching the lions below creep towards their prey.
The attack, when it came, was swift. One moment, all was tranquil and still, then the herd of buffalo scattered. Linus spotted two streaks of gold as a pair of lionesses chased down a straggler. One of the lionesses threw herself on the buffalo’s back, but was cast off when it veered sharply and ran off in another direction – straight into the path of a male lion. Linus held his breath as the lion leapt into the air, though Linus wasn’t sure if the lion did so in order to tackle the buffalo or jump out of the way. He winced as both animals collided, and the lion went flying. Then the buffalo was gone in a cloud of dust; the lionesses had already disappeared. The lion lay motionless on the ground.
Linus scaled down the outcrop, skidding on loose stones as he descended. He knew it was Fleck before he even reached the ground. While Dark was brave enough to take on an elephant single-handed, Linus didn’t think he was reckless enough to place himself that close to the herd: not when he could send a younger lion instead. Linus knew he should leave Fleck. Fleck had abandoned the pride when it needed him most and then betrayed them all by joining the Wanderers. But Fleck was family. Linus had to help him if he could.
As he drew closer to Fleck, Linus prepared himself for the worst. Then he thought the worst when he saw all the blood. However, Fleck’s chest was heaving and his eyes were open and fixed on Linus.
“Linus,” Fleck croaked.
Linus gulped. “Hi, Fleck.”
“This is it, Linus. I’m done for.”
Linus snorted. “Don’t be daft. ’Course you’re not.”
Fleck sighed sadly. “I can see a bright light. It’s-it’s right above me.”
“Yes, I can see it too,” Linus said. “It’s the sun, Fleck.” He bent his head and started lapping up the blood on Fleck’s chest.
“What are you doing?” Fleck raised his head weakly before flopping down again. “This isn’t the time for a wash. Can’t you see I’m dying?”
Linus paused in his washing. Now that he’d cleaned away some of the blood, he could get a proper look at the wound. It wasn’t in the chest as he’d suspected, but the shoulder, the blood having flowed copiously from the wound. The gash was long but shallow. Fleck had been lucky. “You’re not going to die.”
“You’re just saying that to make me feel better,” Fleck said.
“No, honestly. You just need some time to heal, that’s all.”
Fleck laughed bitterly. “I’ll die before that happens. If I don’t starve first, I’ll be picked off by another – Whoa! What are you doing?” Linus had grabbed Fleck by the scruff, gaining a mouthful of mane in the process, and was hauling him away from the river. “You can’t take me back to the pride. It’s too far. Besides, they’d kill me on sight…or is that what you’re hoping? Wouldn’t it be easier for both of us if you simply killed me yourself?”
Linus released Fleck’s scruff and spat fur out of his mouth. “I’m trying to save you, you ungrateful git.” He seized Fleck again and tugged even harder.
“That doesn’t make any sense. You’ve always resented me because I’m more handsome and virile than you. And-and I know that, naturally, you hate me because I’m an orphan.”
Linus groaned around his burden and fought the urge to put them both out of their misery. Fortunately, they had almost made it to their destination: a patch of scrub that would provide Fleck with some shelter and protection. He was panting by the time they reached it, though he fought valiantly to hide this from Fleck. “I don’t know about you, but I haven’t eaten in almost three days. I’m going hunting. I’d like to catch a wildebeest, but I’ll probably be lucky if I bring back a warthog.”
Fleck was staring at Linus in disbelief, but he said, “A warthog would do just as well. Besides, wildebeest is overrated.”
Linus ended up bringing back an impala. He waited until Fleck had eaten his fill before taking his own share. Fleck fell asleep before he was done. Once Linus had finished eating, he lay right beside Fleck to keep him warm, his chest against Fleck’s back and one front leg wrapped around Fleck’s body. However, he remained awake, vigilant, observing his surroundings. He was on watch for less than an hour when he saw it: the silhouette of a male lion. Careful not to disturb Fleck, Linus rose to meet this latest challenge.
It was Dark. If he hadn’t recognized him by his scent, he would have known him by his black mane and the cruel glint in his yellow eyes. Linus fought the growl that was rumbling in his throat. Dark was shrewd and clever, as well as being ruthless. Linus would need to keep a cool head when dealing with him.
Dark studied Linus with interest as he approached. “So, you’ve become a nomad. Why? You led the defence against the Wanderers. You should be ruling the pride.”
Linus ignored the question. “What do you want, Dark?”
“I wanted to know if Fleck was dead.”
Linus snorted. “Why? You had no qualms about abandoning him when he was wounded.”
“It was the lionesses who abandoned him, not that they had any choice.”
Linus flicked his tail irritably. “They could have gone back.”
“I came,” Dark said. He glanced in the direction of the scrub. “Is he dying?”
Linus sighed. “No, he’s not dying. He’ll be able to rejoin the Wanderers once he’s healed.”
“I don’t want him back. My only objective is to end his suffering.”
Linus’ eyes narrowed. “He’s not suffering.”
“No, he’s not,” Dark said, “and I think we should keep it that way.”
“I don’t under–”
“He doesn’t belong with the Wanderers. He’s almost as out of place as your sister was.” Dark grimaced and Linus was sure that it wasn’t just because a hyena’s mocking laugh could be heard in the distance. “How is Suki?” Dark asked softly.
Linus managed to suppress another growl, but only just. “She’s happy. She’s had another litter of cubs with Lush. He’s a good father to both his cubs and Rory.”
Dark’s eyes widened in surprise. “He didn’t kill Rory?”
“No, he didn’t. No doubt, you see that as a weakness.”
“Not necessarily,” Dark said, “though I don’t know if I can say the same for your actions.” A breeze ruffled Dark’s mane, but he didn’t seem to notice. “It’s hard enough fending for yourself when you’re a nomad, but having an injured lion will slow you down and make you even more vulnerable.”
Linus’ tail twitched, but he revealed no other sign of emotion. “I can’t leave him; he’s family.”
“I think you’re mad, but I admire your courage and your loyalty.” Dark stretched, spreading his paws out in front of him. “If you survive, you’re welcome to join the Wanderers. I need to form a new coalition.”
“No, thank you.” Linus turned and started heading back to the scrub. “Goodnight, Dark.”
Fleck’s recovery was slow, but reassuringly steady. After two days, Fleck was able to limp painfully, if assisted by Linus. He was exhausted by the time they made it to the river and lay panting on the bank before he was able to drink.
“Do you think this happened because I’m an orphan?” Fleck asked.
Linus resisted the urge to drown himself. “No, I think this happened because you crashed into a buffalo.”
“No,” Fleck said. “I mean, do you think that’s why the lionesses abandoned me?”
Linus’ whiskers drooped and he slumped down on the bank. “Forget them. Forget all of the Wanderers.”
“And become a nomad, like you?” At Linus’s startled glance, Fleck said, “I’m not stupid or blind. You wouldn’t have been able to stay here and look after me if you were still with the pride.”
“Oh. Right.”
“I also overheard your conversation with Dark. Looks like I’m a nomad too.”
Linus stared down at his paws sheepishly. “I’m sorry, Fleck.”
Fleck gave a nonchalant swish of his tail. “Are you kidding? I’m well shot of them. The Wanderers were holding me back.”
“Really?”
“Oh, yeah,” Fleck said. “Dark was becoming impossible. I think it was because he felt threatened by me – because I’m so much younger than he is.” He laughed. “Why, he’s practically geriatric in comparison.”
Linus almost laughed himself. If Dark was geriatric then James and Eddy were positively ancient. Also, to his knowledge, geriatric lions stuck close to their prides. They didn’t play nomad and strike out on their own – not even for a few hours. If Linus wasn’t mistaken, that was exactly what Dark was doing now. He was sure he had caught a whiff of Dark’s scent on the wind.
“Come on,” Linus said. “We’d better go before you have another run in with a buffalo.”
They were making their way back to the scrub when Linus spotted it: a freshly killed wildebeest lying just outside their tiny makeshift camp.
Wow. He’s good.
Fleck gaped at the wildebeest in amazement. “Where did that come from?”
“A geriatric lion, I should think,” Linus said.
Fleck’s eyes widened. “Oh. Well, that’s kind. Awfully kind.” He cleared his throat. “Of course, you know what this means. He obviously realized what a terrible mistake he made and he’s trying to woo me back.”
“Oh, I’m sure that must be the reason.” Linus hid a smile and thought that maybe Dark wasn’t such a bastard after all.
A few days later, Fleck had recovered enough for them to relocate to another camp. Fleck still couldn’t move quickly or travel very far, but at least he was able to walk, unaided. Also, much to Linus’ surprise, Fleck offered to take a turn keeping watch, allowing Linus to catch up on some much-needed sleep. However, Fleck still couldn’t hunt. When night fell, Linus stationed himself in the grass, close to the river. He had seen a herd of zebras there the night before, but he’d failed to make a kill. He hoped they would return, so he might have a second chance. What he wasn’t anticipating was an encounter with an enraged elephant.
It seemed to come out of nowhere. The only warning was a low rumble. Then the ground began to vibrate, and Linus knew he was in trouble.
Linus just managed to avoid being crushed, but he was unable to escape the elephant altogether. Before he could dodge out of the way, he was hit by a grey tree-trunk – one of the elephant’s massive front legs. Fortunately, Linus was thrown clear of the elephant’s path, though he was left stunned and winded. He also had a horrible feeling that the elephant wasn’t finished with him yet. Elephants had bad tempers and were prone to fits of violence when they were provoked. Linus wasn’t sure what had set off this elephant, but his anger was all too apparent given the furious trumpeting. Maybe there were calves nearby, though this wasn’t a mother but a male – a teenager by the look of him.
Linus tried to stand, but his legs shook, his head ached, and dark splotches obscured his vision. He toppled over and closed his eyes, bracing for impact. Then his eyes flew open as he heard a deafening roar. An instant later, Fleck was standing between him and the elephant, shielding Linus with his body.
The elephant froze. It would seem that reason was returning if he was questioning the wisdom of his present course. When three more roars reverberated around him, the elephant turned and stormed off.
“Are you okay?” Fleck asked.
“Yeah. Fine.” Linus attempted to get up and fell on the ground again. “Just a bit…It’ll pass.” He closed his eyes, fighting a wave of dizziness. “What are you doing here, anyway? And where did those other lions come from?”
“Ah, it might be easier if I answer your second question first,” Fleck said. “These lionesses are members of our new pride.”
I must have hit my head harder than I thought. “What are you talking about, Fleck?”
Fleck smiled sheepishly. “They crept up on me while I was asleep. I was sure they were going to kill me, as I’ve always been convinced I’ll die young, but then they told me they were recruiting, that they were looking for two young males. Ask Nyaga. She’ll tell you.”
Six lionesses were approaching them, but Linus only saw one. She was long and agile with a graceful neck and large luminous eyes. Her coat was sleek and smooth, almost creamy in the moonlight. She was magnificent. She also turned out to be Nyaga.
“I know it’s a bit unusual,” Nyaga said, once all the introductions had been made, “but it’s for the sake of the pride. We lost our young adult male almost a week ago when the pride was attacked by a pair of nomads. Roho was able to drive them off with our help, but he’s old and can’t protect the pride on his own.”
Linus was sure he would leap through fire for Nyaga or, at least, a thick bank of smoke, but, when it came to prides, one had to be sensible. “You’ll forgive me saying this, but if you needed new adult males why didn’t you just accept the males who attacked your pride?”
Nyaga’s eyes flashed angrily. “After they killed Oringo?”
“Yes.” It was harsh, but it was the way many prides were built.
“They headed straight for the crèche when they attacked,” Nyaga snarled. “They were going to kill the cubs.”
Once again, this was the sad reality of the wild. Infanticide was all too common. Linus’ own sister had lost cubs, and Linus had seen the deep sorrow in Suki’s eyes when she spoke of them. However, even without Suki’s loss, Linus would have been against infanticide. His mother had raised him to believe that it was cruel and unnecessary.
“How do you know you can trust us?” Linus asked. “What makes you think we won’t try to kill either Roho or the cubs?”
Nyaga looked at Fleck and smiled. “You’ve already demonstrated great mercy by nursing your friend when you could have easily left him to die.”
Linus found he was smiling himself. “And Fleck did likewise when he tried to protect me from that elephant.”
“Yes,” Nyaga said.
Linus glanced at Fleck. He seemed to be getting rather cozy with a lioness named Fayola. In fact, if that stupid look on his face was anything to go by, Fleck was completely smitten. Linus assumed he was wearing the exact same expression.
“Well, I suppose we should at least consider your proposition.”
The sun was high in the sky by the time they arrived. Linus felt a lump rise in his throat as he caught sight of it because, in many ways, it resembled his old pride area. For a moment, he thought his mother might appear to scold him for staying out all night and worrying her to death. He didn’t see Macheeba, of course, but a party did greet them. Six chubby cubs ran towards them on their stumpy little legs. No, Linus thought. They’re running towards Fayola and Fleck.
“New daddy! New daddy!”
“What?” Fleck gasped. Then he was covered by five cubs that nipped at him playfully. “Teeth! Teeth!” He glared at Fayola. “Are they all yours?”
“Yes,” Fayola said, “but I only gave birth to two of them. I adopted the rest.”
“Oh.” Fleck gazed almost sympathetically at the one cub swinging from his mane. “They’re orphans.”
“Ah, no. Not exactly.” Fayola gazed down at her paws in embarrassment. “My sister ran off to become an actress.”
“I’m sorry? A what?”
“There are groups of humans called ‘film crews’,” Fayola said. “They travel across the savannah making ‘nature documentaries’.” She sighed wearily. “We would never have known that such things existed if a toffee-nosed tart named Esmeralda hadn’t been passing through. She turned my poor sister’s head. Instead of staying with the pride to raise her cubs, Malika went off to find one of these ‘film crews’.” Fayola shuddered in disgust.
The sixth cub, who had hung back from the rest, poked Fayola with her paw and stared up at her with her big round cub eyes. “Director?”
“No, pet. Daddy.”
“Oh,” the cub said. Then she went over to Fleck and started chewing on his tail.
Linus, who had been watching the entire scene with a mixture of amusement and horror, turned to Nyaga hesitantly. “So, you don’t have any cubs?”
“No, but I’m hoping to have a litter soon.”
Linus glanced down at Nyaga’s belly in surprise. “Oh, you’re pregnant? Well, um, congratulations.”
Nyaga smiled and mischief seemed to dance behind her eyes. “No, Linus, I’m not pregnant. I’ve been waiting for the right lion to come along.”
“Oh?” Linus said. Then he looked at Nyaga more closely. “Oh.”
“Whoa!” Fleck said. “What the hell happened to you? You look completely shattered.”
Linus stumbled over to Fleck and collapsed. He was so exhausted that he didn’t even put up a fight when one of Fleck’s cubs climbed on his head to chew on an ear.
“You have to help me. I-I can’t take it anymore.”
“Can’t take what anymore?” Fleck asked. “Where have you been? I haven’t seen you all day. Haven’t seen Nyaga either, for that matter…Oh! Wait a minute! Have you two been–”
“She won’t leave me alone, Fleck,” Linus moaned. “I mean, it was great the first seven or eight times, but–”
“I hate you,” Fleck said.
“I wouldn’t mind so much if she’d let me have a decent nap in between, but she throws herself at me before I can even close my eyes.”
“I truly, truly hate you.”
Linus gazed at Fleck beseechingly. “Please. You’ve got to help me.”
“How? If I try to get between you two, Nyaga’s going to tear me apart.”
“Maybe you could hide me,” Linus said.
Fleck stared at Linus incredulously. “Hide you?”
“If we took all the cubs and placed them on top of me, Nyaga might think I’m you.”
“Linus,” a female voice called.
“I think it’s too late for that, mate,” Fleck muttered. Then he laughed when he saw the frightened look on Linus’ face. “I thought you wanted cubs. I thought you wanted to pass down your genes and make Macheeba a grandmother. Again.”
“Well, yeah, I do, but–”
“If you want to become a father, there are certain sacrifices you need to make, such as giving up sleep and food,” Fleck said.
Linus gasped. “Sleep and food?”
“Oh, yeah. This could go on for days.”
“LINUS!”
Linus was now completely panic-stricken. “But-but surely she’s had enough. We’ve already mated fourteen times.”
“Linus, I’ve known lions that have mated up to forty times. In one day.”
“Forty times?” Linus cried. “No, I can’t do it. It’s-it’s too much to ask without a nap.”
Fleck eyed Linus sternly. “You have to do it for the sake of the pride.”
“LINUS, GET YOUR ARSE OVER HERE NOW!”
“She sounds a bit cranky,” Fleck said. “I think you’d better do as she says.”
“Yeah, all right.” Linus shook the cub off him and rose reluctantly to his feet. “Coming, dear!”
“I’m sorry, love,” Linus said to his son, “but it’s just not going to work. I’m a daddy lion.”
Lionel released the teat and stared up at his father. “No milk?”
“No milk.”
Lionel scowled. “But I’m a boy lion, so I should drink daddy lion milk.”
Linus smiled sadly. “If I could give you milk, I would, Lionel, but mine don’t work.”
“Why not?”
Linus sighed. “I wish I knew. I asked your grandmother the same question when I was about your age, but she said she didn’t know.”
Lionel growled. “It’s stupid. If we have them, they should work.”
“I couldn’t agree with you more, Lionel, but I’m afraid there’s nothing we can do about it.” Linus frowned when Lionel still didn’t seem convinced. “Look, just wait till your mum’s asleep and nip in then. That usually works.”
“She is asleep,” Lionel said, “but Macheeba, Safiya and Jahzara are there.”
“So? They’re your sisters, Lionel. They need milk too.”
Lionel leaned against Linus, pressing his furry little face into Linus’ mane. “They’re bigger than me and-and they tease me.”
Linus licked Lionel affectionately. “Well, maybe if you spent more time with your mum and less time with me, they wouldn’t be bigger than you,” he said. “As for the teasing, it’s their job. They’re your sisters. They’re supposed to tease you. Mine certainly did. You just need to tease them back. Tell them they smell like hippos and are as ugly as baboons.”
Lionel sniffed miserably. “But that’s what they said to me!”
“Oh.” Linus glanced helplessly at Fleck. While he hated to admit it, Fleck was the more experienced father of the two. To Linus’ surprise, Fleck was already looking in their direction and whispering in his foster son’s ear.
Zareb was nearly a year old and quite a bit bigger than Lionel. However, he had always been gentle when the two played and seemed happy enough spending time with the younger cub. He sauntered over to Lionel and butted him with his head. “Come on, I’m hungry. Let’s see if those greedy pigs have left us any milk.”
“Okay.” Lionel quickly followed Zareb, his father completely forgotten.
“Thanks, Zareb,” Linus said, raising his voice to call after the cub.
Zareb looked over his shoulder and grinned. “No worries, Uncle Linus.”
Linus turned his head to Fleck, catching his eye. “I suppose I should thank you too, seeing as you’re the one who put him up to it.”
Fleck gave a casual toss of his mane before rolling lazily on his side. “I thought maybe he could be the older brother I never was.”
Linus smiled and stretched out as well. “Oh, I don’t know about that. You’ve certainly been making up for lost time lately, Fleck.”
“Hmm,” Fleck said and then promptly fell asleep.
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no subject
Date: 2012-04-26 03:34 am (UTC)I like thinking about Martin and Rupert as dads themselves doing these voices. Love thinking about Rupert's character mating to the point of exhaustion. Go, Linus!
Such a happy bed time story.
I do not think it is dramedy or parody or all of those other self deprecating things you said. It is fan fic of a movie, no diff. from any other good fan fic.
Thank you!
no subject
Date: 2012-04-26 03:32 pm (UTC)Oh, thank you,
I like thinking about Martin and Rupert as dads themselves doing these voices.
Oh, good! I'm glad to hear that! I also thought about Martin and Rupert as dads when I was writing the scenes involving the cubs. :-)
Love thinking about Rupert's character mating to the point of exhaustion. Go, Linus!
Well, when I came across that particular statistic about lion mating (that it can happen anywhere from 20-40 times a day), I had to work it in somehow! *g*
Such a happy bed time story.
I'm thrilled you think so considering you read this before going to bed. :-) I had to log off shortly after posting the story, which is why I'm only seeing and responding to your generous comments now.
I do not think it is dramedy or parody or all of those other self deprecating things you said. It is fan fic of a movie, no diff. from any other good fan fic.
It just seemed like there was a pretty big shift in tone when Linus and Fleck reached their new pride. However, I'm happy the story still worked for. Your words of encouragement mean a lot! :-D
Thank you!
No, thank you! It's was extremely kind of you to read and comment so quickly! It's very much appreciated! :-D
no subject
Date: 2012-04-26 05:39 pm (UTC)This is adorable! I love Fleck! Of course everyone hates him because he's an orphan. Hee!
“If we took all the cubs and placed them on top of me, Nyaga might think I’m you.” Hilarious!
I'm probably missing some in-jokes, but I really enjoyed this.
Plus, you know, active female characters! I don't think you'll be taking over our pride and killing our cubs! Nah-ah! We'll find our own guys, thanks!
The shift in tones works for me. You have the conflict, you have the redemption of the characters, and then the lighter tones reads like an extended happy ending. I found A Matter of Pride really satisfying because you didn't rush it. It's nice to enjoy their happiness and see their new lives.
no subject
Date: 2012-04-26 08:45 pm (UTC)Damn you, LJ! How dare you eat
BTW, thanks for taking the time to leave a second comment. :-)
This is adorable! I love Fleck! Of course everyone hates him because he's an orphan. Hee!
Oh, thank you! I'm happy you enjoyed it! :-D I'm also happy you love Fleck! Woo hoo! Just picture Martin Freeman doing his voice and he becomes even more squeeworthy! Oh, and the multiple orphan lines are canon. He had a major chip on his shoulder about that in the original movie.
“If we took all the cubs and placed them on top of me, Nyaga might think I’m you.” Hilarious!
Tee hee hee! I'm glad that gave you a laugh! :-D
I'm probably missing some in-jokes, but I really enjoyed this.
Well, if you ever want to borrow the DVD let me know. Like I said, Martin Freeman does the voice of Fleck (And Rupert Graves is Linus! Rupert Graves is Linus!), so that might interest you. Martin Freeman also hosts a behind-the-scenes documentary of the making of the film, which is also highly enjoyable -- and not just because you get to see Rupert Graves sucking his thumb. *g*
Plus, you know, active female characters! I don't think you'll be taking over our pride and killing our cubs! Nah-ah! We'll find our own guys, thanks!
I'm happy you approve! I was trying to figure out how to have Linus and Fleck stumble across a pride and then decided to make it easy on myself and have the pride stumble on them. *g* As prides are quite matriarchal, I was hoping it wouldn't be too big a stretch (as I was obviously aiming for realism with this fic *snort*).
The shift in tones works for me. You have the conflict, you have the redemption of the characters, and then the lighter tones reads like an extended happy ending.
I'm so relieved to hear that, especially if you view the lighter tones as an extended happy ending. :-)
I found A Matter of Pride really satisfying because you didn't rush it. It's nice to enjoy their happiness and see their new lives.
Thanks again! That’s so kind of you! :-D I’m thrilled that you found the pace satisfying and enjoyed seeing both our heroes living happily in their new pride.
no subject
Date: 2012-04-27 08:16 am (UTC)Linus and Fleck are great. I love them with the cubs, especially Lionel wanting ' daddy lion milk!" Malika running off to find a film crew and the sixth cub wanting to know if Linus was "Director" - great! The lionesses running their own pride is wonderful. Poor exhausted Linus!
I enjoyed reading this. Thank you!
no subject
Date: 2012-04-27 07:24 pm (UTC)I wouldn't say it was sad. There are a couple of sad moments, but nothing unbearably sad. Okay, Fleck's mother and Suki's cubs are killed, but it's nothing you actually see happening. In the case of the cubs, you only realize they've been killed because Suki isn't able to find them. You don't see them get killed or even see any bodies. I know it may not seem like it based on the Wikipedia article, but the movie is funny for the most part.
There are a few clips from Pride on YouTube. I'll either send them to you privately or post them in a separate comment. I can't get them at the moment because I'm at work.
But I knew your fic would be fun and I wasn't disappointed.
Oh, that's good! I'm happy you weren't disappointed! Thank you for taking the time to read my crazy fic! I appreciate it,
I know I've said it so many times but your warm humourous style is a joy to read and your stories always make me smile.
That's such a kind thing to say! I'm thrilled that my style works for you and that my stories can make you smile! Thank you very much! :-D
Linus and Fleck are great.
I'm glad you like them! I tried to keep them in character, so hopefully they reflect canon to at least some degree.
I love them with the cubs, especially Lionel wanting ' daddy lion milk!"
The cubs were a lot of fun to write, especially Lionel. That whole milk issue is a reference to a scene from the original movie in which Linus (as a cub) is horrified to learn that he won't be able to produce his own milk when he grows up. Uh, it's funnier than it sounds and, happily, that scene is one of the clips available on YouTube. In fact, it's what made me decide to buy the DVD. *g*
Malika running off to find a film crew and the sixth cub wanting to know if Linus was "Director" - great!
I'm so happy you enjoyed that! The whole scenario just popped into my head during a writing session and I couldn't get it out. *g*
The lionesses running their own pride is wonderful.
Glad you approve! It seemed like the kind of pride Linus and Fleck would end up joining! *g*
Poor exhausted Linus!
I have absolutely no shame, but I had to write that scene once I read some of the rather startling statistics about the mating habits of lions. *g*
I enjoyed reading this. Thank you!
And thank you for taking the time to read and comment! I appreciate it more than I can say! :-D
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Date: 2012-04-28 01:35 am (UTC)Milk Envy -- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SOnyz3UcEXE
Spotting Strange Lions -- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f-BX1Eak6M4
Spitting Cobra vs. Talking Lion Cubs -- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HMiEtEdRmbM
Hunting Lessons -- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EwrucT3Bz4c
Lion Cubs Attacked by Elephants & Alligators -- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b4fSU5gh6ZA&feature=fvsr
Suki Leaves Home -- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zDXUJDnIipM
Hunting Wildebeest -- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mpklwNYzCNI
Lion Fight -- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CmowZilvLhA
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Date: 2012-04-27 02:45 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-04-28 03:19 am (UTC)Your style and your inventiveness are such a complete delight--I can't even tell you how happy I was when I saw that you'd written this.
That's so kind of you to say. It means so much coming from a writer as talented as you. Thank you.
It's the first thing I've read on LJ in weeks, and I'm so glad I saw it (my only LJ alert these days is for gravesdiggers, lest I miss some breaking RG news, so I saw your post there!)
If that's the case then I'm so glad I decided to cross-post on
At first, I thought--oh yay, this might be crazy and cracky--but then I realized that it has your signature combination of completely believable, sweet character development and bits of giggly, joyous humor.
I'm so happy that this went beyond crazy and cracky for you, which I would have accepted btw as the story is crazy and cracky. However, I'm touched that you thought the character development was believable (and that there was character development at all) and that you were able to get a good laugh from this fic. :-D
Having worked for National Geographic for years, of course I loved the aside about the film crew coming and luring the lioness away, and the "director, no daddy" bit was priceless.
I didn't know you worked for National Geographic! How did I not know this?! Well, I'm thrilled that the aside about the film crew had even more meaning for you. And the "director, no daddy" bit is something I hoped people would find funny, so I'm really glad it worked for you!
The shagging-to-exhaustion bit was terrific--all the more so because of its nature documentary accuracy!
Yes, can you tell that I've watched and read a little too much about lions lately? *g* As soon as I learned about a certain mating statistic, I knew I had to work it into the story.
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Date: 2012-04-28 03:20 am (UTC)I can't tell you how thrilled I am to know that the Linus and Fleck friendship worked and that both characters did have recognizable emotions, strengths and weaknesses. I wasn't sure if I had managed to get any of that across, so thanks for sharing this with me. :-D
Fleck even had a character arc in which he went from a slightly comic, self-absorbed blustery orphan to a mature, fatherly member of the new pride--but with just enough of the comic loser still ("I hate you!")
It's wonderful that you saw a definite character arc with Fleck. I wish I could take credit it, but Fleck practically wrote himself. Actually, I was taken by surprise when he did transform to a more mature, fatherly member of the new pride. All the same, I'm glad you were still able to catch glimpses of the comic loser. I don't think Fleck would be Fleck if that wasn't there to some degree.
And you had the good guys survive and thrive because of some very empowered females (take a cue from that, Mr. Moffat!)
The very empowered females also took me by surprise. I can't even remember how that came about. Probably necessity as I needed to find some way to get Linus and Fleck into a pride. In any case, I'm glad all that girl power worked for you. I think it's fitting for what is a fairly matriarchal species.
And all in under 4,000 words. Just a truly enjoyable fic---I hope you'll write more, and I also hope you're doing well otherwise--in terms of the original fic you were hoping to write.
I'm flattered and humbled that you feel I accomplished so much in under 4,000 words and that you did enjoy this insane story. :-D I've had to accept the fact that I may never be able to give up fic writing completely, so there probably will be something else at some point. *g* The original fic is going slower than it should (especially when I'm writing fanfic about lions), but it is going.
It's sweet of you to ask how I'm doing. Other than a bit of work-related stress, I'm doing well. I hope the same can be said for you and you're also okay. :-)
Love and good wishes and hugs.
The same to you,
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Date: 2012-04-29 12:55 am (UTC):D
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Date: 2012-04-29 03:31 am (UTC)Hey,
Then I checked out the youtube links you posted for someone, realized who the voices were, went all O_O for a moment, then reread bits and pieces of this to 'hear' the characters with those voices and it was even more enjoyable the second time around.
:D
I'm so happy that you found the story even more enjoyable once you watched the YouTube links and read the story for a second time! I was hoping that someone besides