How Sweet to be an Idiot

[rusty_armour]

It never ceases to amaze me just how big an idiot I am. I mean, you’d think I’d be used to it by now, but every once in a while something happens to remind me. For example, yesterday I screwed up at work. Screwed up on a rather grand scope. Granted, it wasn’t as terrible as the time my previous boss yelled at me in her office (in front of my supervisor), but it was pretty bad. I spent almost the entire day fixing the mess I had created. I sincerely wanted to crie (cry and die), I felt so stupid and embarrassed. Oh, and angry, but at myself, which is a lot more frustrating. It’s so much easier to blame other people for your problems and mistakes. It’s a lot less painful too.

Of course, anyone who knows me is aware of the fact that I blow most things out of proportion. Another person’s miniscule mistake becomes my epic mishap. On the grand scale of all things editorial, my boo-boo was fairly minor. It just doesn’t seem that way to me. That’s probably why I’m still trying to lay low and avoid my supervisor even more than usual…if that’s actually possible. Hmm…as my behaviour really won’t be all that different, it shouldn’t raise anyone’s suspicions, though naturally I’m assuming that the whole office knows about the travesty I’ve committed and are laughing behind my back. Paranoia? Yeah, I bathe in it.

Well, THIF (Thank Herne It's Friday). If I can just get through the day, I'll be good. And, hey, this is the weekend I'm going to finish the rough draft of my fic, dammit!

Comments

[thegrrrl2002.livejournal.com]

I was just recently contemplating the fact that the older I get, the less traumatized I am by my mistakes. Because I always know I'm going to do something even stupider in the future.

I'm not sure that helps, though. *g*

But you know, we're all human, and we all do deeply stupid things from time to time. Which probably doesn't help much either.

And on a side note, I'm so glad you're into SGA! Yay!

[rusty-armour.livejournal.com]

LOL! Your philosophy on the stupidness to come does help believe it or not. I also take comfort in the fact that we're all human and, thus, we all do deeply stupid things from time to time. It means that I'm not alone in this respect. *g*

I've been meaning to email you since you added me to your friends list, grrrl! Thanks for doing that! :-) And, yes, I'm very much into SGA. It seems to be attracting Enterprise fans in droves, which is great because that means Enterprise fic writers are adding stories to the fandom pool. That reminds me! I read the story you and Chelle wrote recently (A Many-Splendored Thing), but ran out of cyber time before I could comment on it. Suffice it to say, I thought it was hot and hilarious! I love it that Sheppard indulged McKay's kink at the end! Too funny!

[thegrrrl2002.livejournal.com]

LOL, SGA seems to be attracting fans from every fandom! But yes, there are a lot of ENT folks, and it's so much fun to be in a fandom with them again.

And I'm glad you liked "Many-Splendored"! It was silly but chelle and I had a whole lot of fun writing it.

[rusty-armour.livejournal.com]

I think you're right about SGA's mass appeal. It has attracted people from numerous fandoms. I was just thrilled when I saw so many ENT folks writing stories for SGA. It's definitely fun to be sharing a fandom with them again. :-)

I really got a kick out of "Many-Splendored"! I could tell just by reading it that you and chelle had fun writing it. I'm eagerly waiting to see what you and/or chelle come up with next. :-)

[smithereen.livejournal.com]

Ugh. I HATE THAT. The worst is when it's your own mistake, and your own fault, and you can't blame anyone else...you just have to swallow it. I'm the same way with believing all my mistakes are epic mishaps, but as people remind me...we're human, we all make them. Perfection isn't possible, even if we expect it from ourselves. It still sucks but you know... This too shall pass and other comforting cliches :)

[rusty-armour.livejournal.com]

That's what's so annoying! I can only blame myself. I keep telling myself to suck it up, Marine (I think I've watched too much JAG) and let it go. However, letting things go is also one of my weaknesses. *g* It's nice to see that I'm not the only one who believes her mistakes are epic mishaps. BTW you're right about perfection being impossible and that we shouldn't expect it from other people or ourselves.

I've actually started feeling better about the whole thing. It probably helps that I just received my yearly raise (talk about irony) and that the day is half over. :-)

[anitamaid.livejournal.com]

Hey kid;) You're too tough on yourself. But I know what you mean, I tend to blow things out of propotion myself, and quite often - I find that people around me don't even notice the errors I make... (And I've made a few let me tell you). People who don't make errors, they don't work - that's my motto.

THIF - I second that;)

[rusty-armour.livejournal.com]

Ahhhh! And now you've made me feel better too! :-) I think you're right about people not necessarily noticing your errors...and I'm not just saying that to comfort myself. *g* I really like your motto. People who work have to make errors or else they really aren't working. In other words, it's impossible to go through life without messing up.

Glad you second the THIF. I hope your weekend is a good one. :-)

[anitamaid.livejournal.com]

Hope you have a GREAT! weekend;)

If I'm not feeling too bad... I might actually finally get to do some scrapbooking. - don't laugh, I'm old!