How Sweet to be an Idiot

[rusty_armour]

It never ceases to amaze me just how big an idiot I am. I mean, you’d think I’d be used to it by now, but every once in a while something happens to remind me. For example, yesterday I screwed up at work. Screwed up on a rather grand scope. Granted, it wasn’t as terrible as the time my previous boss yelled at me in her office (in front of my supervisor), but it was pretty bad. I spent almost the entire day fixing the mess I had created. I sincerely wanted to crie (cry and die), I felt so stupid and embarrassed. Oh, and angry, but at myself, which is a lot more frustrating. It’s so much easier to blame other people for your problems and mistakes. It’s a lot less painful too.

Of course, anyone who knows me is aware of the fact that I blow most things out of proportion. Another person’s miniscule mistake becomes my epic mishap. On the grand scale of all things editorial, my boo-boo was fairly minor. It just doesn’t seem that way to me. That’s probably why I’m still trying to lay low and avoid my supervisor even more than usual…if that’s actually possible. Hmm…as my behaviour really won’t be all that different, it shouldn’t raise anyone’s suspicions, though naturally I’m assuming that the whole office knows about the travesty I’ve committed and are laughing behind my back. Paranoia? Yeah, I bathe in it.

Well, THIF (Thank Herne It's Friday). If I can just get through the day, I'll be good. And, hey, this is the weekend I'm going to finish the rough draft of my fic, dammit!

Comments

[rusty-armour.livejournal.com]

That's what's so annoying! I can only blame myself. I keep telling myself to suck it up, Marine (I think I've watched too much JAG) and let it go. However, letting things go is also one of my weaknesses. *g* It's nice to see that I'm not the only one who believes her mistakes are epic mishaps. BTW you're right about perfection being impossible and that we shouldn't expect it from other people or ourselves.

I've actually started feeling better about the whole thing. It probably helps that I just received my yearly raise (talk about irony) and that the day is half over. :-)